Ever find yourself *not* speaking up even though something your co-worker said just didn’t sit right with you? Or have you ever wondered if you and your partner have somewhat of a codependent relationship? Or maybe you have an out-of-body reaction if you sense that your family doesn’t approve of your recent choice to move to another state. As in, if you’re not seeking approval, like, what are you even doing?
All of these scenarios are examples of ways we can abandon ourselves and make everyone else and every thing outside of us much more important. We often adopt behavior like silencing ourselves, becoming codependent, saying “yes” when we really mean “no”, and a ton of other tactics to legitimately keep ourselves safe. Seriously. We do it because somewhere along the line, we realized these behaviors could serve as a coping mechanism. And, then, one day, you realize that these methods of coping just aren’t working anymore.
In this week’s show, (the second of a two-part series) I look at 12 common ways we tend to abandon ourselves in order to search for our worth and happiness in external factors. Because many of these behaviors are tactics we adopted to stay safe and protect ourselves, so this certainly isn’t a chastisement but rather a way to examine what we do, why we do it, and how to choose behaviors that feel empowering and honoring. Grab a pen and paper because this episode is loaded with at-home assignments!
This pod explores:
- Learning how to acknowledge your feelings and my favorite tool to address emotions (without feeling widely freaked out)
- Understanding what a codependent relationship may look like and what to do if you find yourself in this situation
- My absolute favorite self-talk statement if you struggle with constant approval seeking
- Discerning when to say ‘no’ and when to say ‘yes’ and the best tip for saying ‘no’ without feeling like an asshole
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NEW *FREE* WORKSHOP
READY TO GET RID OF PERFECTIONISM, SELF-DOUBT, AND OVERWHELM?
OF COURSE, YOU ARE!
If you’re DONE feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and stressed out because you’re constantly doing, doing, doing for everyone else, then you must grab your seat in this brand-new workshop! You’ll learn the exact five-step process I take my clients through so they can let go of all the stress and angst of striving for “perfect” and caring waaaaay too much what everyone else thinks.
It’s time to finally believe in yourself, find that self-confidence you crave, and start living your life for YOU. So, clickety-click RIGHT HUURRR or click that image to the right to get on The List! #yourewelcome
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Additional Resources:
- Grab your seat at my workshop!! FOR FREE!!
- POD #227: “No”Vember: How To Say “No” (And Not Feel Guilty)
- POD #265: Who’s Talking? My Inner Critic? Or My Intuition? How To Tell The Difference
- POD #356: Understanding Emotional Intelligence – Connecting What You Feel With What You Do
- POD #357: 6 Ways To Start Speaking Up For Yourself
- POD #370: True Or False: Emotional Intelligence Edition
- POD #378: Dealing With The Constant Need For Approval
- POD #396: [Amy Says] How-the-hell To Establish Lasting Boundaries
- POD #397: [Dial An Expert] Kate Anthony On Establishing Boundaries
- POD #398: [Coaching Session] Working With Isabel On Familial Boundaries
- POD #399: [Tool] Working With Handwriting Analysis To Create Boundaries
- POD #409: [Dial An Expert] Self-abandonment: Letting Go Of Societal Conditioning With Dené Logan
- POD #410: [Dial An Expert] Self-abandonment: Dealing With Codependency With Vanessa Bennett
- POD #411: [Amy Says] 12 Ways We Abandon Ourselves And What To Do About It – Part 1
- Why We Abandon Ourselves and How to Stop, PyschCentral
- Soulessencelove on Instagram or on the Web
- Julia Kristina on Self-Abandonment and Julia’s website
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